Thanks a lot, this is very interesting!
For me C and D share the crown, depending of what mood I am in and of course what the given material calls for. But if I would have to rank them it would be:
C, D, B, E, F, A.
It's basically from most to least mojo and size. The differences in size really surprised me. F and A had significantly less low mids and a "pointier" feel. But I can also see where C and D would just be too much and something more subtle would be appropriate. I once heard a rumor that not everything is rock'n'roll


OH WOW: I just saw that the +3 files are smashed but only compared those (that explains a lot). I thought they where just level raised because someone complained about wrong LUFS, so that according to his/her meter this comparison is useless and the worst ever.

I will give the non-squeezed files a listen later and edit in my findings (liking E a lot now). Again work disrupts one of the most important things in life: compressor comparisons
Cheers
Mork
Edit1: Okay, they are a lot closer when not pushed to the limits. Except for C, which does a good amount of punishment. It really has to fit the music and thereof is usable in the least occasions. But when it fits it rocks. The others definitely have different tones, but it's a little bit like deciding the color of your shirt. It depends on the mood you're in and I don't think that either of them is unusable. I only listened on headphones today, so I want to check on speakers tomorrow. I think there are some differences in spaciousness, which are better revealed on speakers. After that I will add my "non-spanked" ranking an a wild guess which ones are hardware.
Edit2: I listened on speakers today. Of course there are differences but I think none of the compressors is unusable. And I think that is remarkable considering the price range of 29$ to something like 2900$. So here are my wild guesses in order of like-o-meter:
E - SSL hardware - Nice glue and most width, tight (never used it)
F - STAM hardware - Fatter bottom than E, loose (never used it)
B - Slate - nice low end to low mids and still nice glue but cleaner than E (used to own but didn't use much)
D - SSL Native - Less low end and a little less glue than B (never used it)
A - Waves - The thinnest and cleanest of the bunch but still very usable (own it but don't use much)
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C - Townhouse - in it's own category (own it, use it occasionaly)
Since I didn't ever use half of the comps these are basically just marketing influenced wild guesses :P
The best thing about that is that I have to be wrong and my Waves G Bus comp is better than I thought!