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Care to critique this little ditty?
Old 23rd November 2009
  #1
Gear Maniac
 
🎧 10 years
Care to critique this little ditty?

This was a tune written by a friend's friend - an older guy who writes songs as a hobby. My friend usually arranges & mixes them, but this time he gave a few to me to have a go at... He just gave me a live drum track, a single vocal & a piano track. At first hearing I thought it was rather corny, but I kind of got drawn in by the vocal that another friend had put on it for him... It conjured up a kind of '80's new wave Blondie / Cars vibe in my mind, so I went with it & layed down all the rest of the music myself... I really don't know if it's any great shakes as a song, but I sure had fun doing it - I'm keen to know your opinions, good or bad - let me have it!

New mix incorporating suggestions given here a few posts down...
Attached Files

Robbie & Johnnie Mix 1 (224).mp3 (5.67 MB, 3293 views)

Old 23rd November 2009
  #2
Lives for gear
 
MikeTSH's Avatar
 
2 Reviews written
🎧 10 years
The vocal needs to come up a little. The hi hat on the drums could do with being reduced and the synth needs to come down a tad. Other than that, its a good mix.
Old 24th November 2009 | Show parent
  #3
Gear Maniac
 
🎧 10 years
Quote:
Originally Posted by MikeTSH ➑️
The vocal needs to come up a little. The hi hat on the drums could do with being reduced and the synth needs to come down a tad. Other than that, its a good mix.
Thanks for giving it a listen & commenting. I'll definitely adjust those elements. Someone made a comment with the mix being slightly muddy. Is this apparent to you?
Old 24th November 2009 | Show parent
  #4
Lives for gear
 
1 Review written
🎧 15 years
Hmmm.... fairly good song. Good mix.

I say put some 5K to 7K on her vocal.
Old 24th November 2009 | Show parent
  #5
Gear Maniac
 
🎧 10 years
Quote:
Originally Posted by piano ➑️
Hmmm.... fairly good song. Good mix.

I say put some 5K to 7K on her vocal.
Yeah, the more I listen to it, the more I feel the vocal needs brightening up... Thanks for the listen & the comment.
Old 25th November 2009
  #6
Here for the gear
 
🎧 10 years
Vocals up. Guitar (left) little softer / less high end (its complex pattern interferes a bit with the vocals). For the rest it is ok I think.
Matter of taste: I probably would make the snare and high hat more rock / dirty / less smooth.
Old 25th November 2009 | Show parent
  #7
Gear Maniac
 
🎧 10 years
Great suggestions! Thanks for listening.
Old 15th December 2009 | Show parent
  #8
Gear Maniac
 
🎧 10 years
I've uploaded a new mix, putting into effect some of the great suggestions I've been given - any better?
Attached Files
Old 16th December 2009 | Show parent
  #9
Gear Maniac
 
🎧 10 years
Quote:
Originally Posted by Peacock ➑️
The song is good. The drums seem to be a drum machine or midi based. These are not live drums are they?
Thanks, Yep - the drums are live for sure - played by a 15yr old!
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